Apparently The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz has been on The New York Times Bestseller List for over eight years, but I only heard about it now from a blog post on Shiny Yoga.
Two of the agreements especially made me take notice because these are things I've been trying to work on. They are:
DON'T TAKE ANYTHING PERSONALLY
Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.
*sigh* I don't really want to go into this one, just know that I am reminded that it is something I want to work on.
and:
DON'T MAKE ASSUMPTIONS
Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstanding, sadness, and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.
While I ask a lot of questions about almost anything and everything, I don't always express what I really want. I've been trying to do this more often and express my wishes in the clearest, most straightforward way possible.
I realize that I don't often express what I really want because I don't want to be selfish, but I also realize that not expressing what I want can sometimes complicate matters more when feelings get involved. Besides, there is a difference between being selfish and standing up for yourself...I'm still trying to define the line between the two in my head. One thing I know for sure is that a healthy dose of standing up for myself once in a while is a good thing, don't you think?
***Cross-posted on Trying to Wake
Life: a balance of holding on and letting go
2 days ago
3 comments:
I think I see the point of the first one, but it doesn't sit well with me yet.
"Nothing others do is because of you." But some of what they do, they do TO you. That's why it hurts. I don't care why the person did it, I care how it affected me, my job, my family, my everything.
I like the second one though. :-)
"I care how it affected me, my job, my family, my everything."
I so agree. I think though the thing to remember is that they don't do these things because of you per se (no matter how much it may affect you and those around you) but more because of how you make people feel about themselves?
I don't know. Was that too convoluted? Did that even make sense?
I don't know about the first one. It sounds too much like trying to lull you into a false sense of security. So nothing that happens is really about you personally so you don't need to feel any sense or responsibility? And, like you both were saying, it's done TO you. The second one I totally agree with! I always, always quote a line from Die Hard: "Assumption is the mother of all f*@! ups."
Post a Comment